HOW DOES YOUR BOOK SENSE TRUMP COMMON SENSE?
Here in Atlanta, we have the AJC...the Atlanta Journal Constitution.  In it there is what is called the VENT.  It's a low tech version of Tweeting...without the restriction of 140 characters...although some of them could use some serious editing. 
There are many viewpoints, some of them worthy of airing, some witty and thoughtful, some poignant and some should have kept their vents closed. 
The other day there was one that said, "Book sense is always better than common sense."
See what I mean?  The author or THIS one, in MY opinion has an abundance of NEITHER book, nor common sense.
If he or she HAD common sense, he or she would have seen the nonsense in that view of sense. 
Book sense?  Suppose the book were "Mein Kamf" or "Das Kapital" "The Little Red Book;" or other propagandist tomes.  If you're atheist, suppose someone's book sense came from the "The Holy Bible?"  Would you consider that person's potential belief in Creationism to be good sense?  What if the book was the Koran?  Would you consider its literal translation to kill all infidels to be sensical...common or otherwise?

The point I'm making is, common sense is increasingly UNCOMMON these days.  Want some examples?


TERROR IN TEXAS?

Texas is now on a TERROR watch because some slimeball has been smuggling SOMALI JIHADISTS across the Mexican border.  Common sense would tell you that the border is a dangerous and vulnerable place and MUST be protected and SEALED NOW.  Your book sense my tell you that doing THAT would be inhumane, unconstitutional and racist.
And the Counter-Terrorist Czar does not believe that JIHAD is a threat?  He says it's a reasonable part of the Islamic faith?  Really?  Is that what YOUR common sense is telling you? 


AND YOUR HEALTH CARE...DID YOU REALLY BELIEVE IT WOULD COST LESS?  REALLY? 
OBAMA-CARE was PROMISED to lower costs of health care, increase the number of people covered and lower the deficits.  Your common sense would tell you to READ THE FREAKIN BILL BEFORE YOU PASS IT INTO LAW.  Your book sense would say, these people in Congress and the White House know better how to spend your money and know what is good for you.  Your book sense may tell you that health care is a RIGHT and that achieving all those goals are totally in reach.
You common sense would say to you, NO WAY IN HELL.
Now after people have ACTUALLY READ the bill we're finding that over 650 employers were surveyed and it was nearly unanimous;  it will RAISE the cost of providing insurance by 88% and THAT will be passed down to the EMPLOYEES.  So your cost for health insurance is going up and OH, BY THE WAY...you're going to have to PAY TAXES ON THAT NOW.  Did you know that? 
Common sense would have told you it's not a good idea.

SO, THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL BEING ON TOP OF THE BP SPILL?  REALLY?
If you're President of the United States and you say you've been on top of the BP Oil spill SINCE DAY ONE, and you wake up thinking about it and go to bed thinking about it that if common sense is your guide would you spend so much time doing this?
I mean, after all your DAUGHTER, MALIA came in while you were shaving and asked, "Have you plugged the hole, yet, Daddy?"  Right?  Sooo...why has this man, who is so focused on getting BP TO "PLUG THE DAMN HOLE," played 3 5-hour rounds of golf in the PAST FOUR DAYS?
Your book sense would tell you that during this worst environmental disaster in American history...and you claim to be a champion of the environment...it would be a good idea to play golf, lunch with Bill, try on uniforms with Duke, fund-raise with Boxer and go on vacation AGAIN...the SECOND TIME SINCE THE DISASTER OCCURRED. 
Your common sense, on the other hand, might tell you it would be a better idea to spend more time with the people of the Gulf Coast region, fighting this disaster and THEN maybe attending the wreath laying at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery on MEMORIAL DAY, instead. 

But that's just MY common sense speaking to me.  What does it say to you? 

JUST A LITTLE BOO BOO, HUH, GUYS?
(from Fox News)
Oh, did you hear the latest?  BP says...oops...we made a little boo boo.  Just before that whole thing blew...well...we...ah...kinda ignored some warning signs of danger...and we just continued to pump...and well...there was a big kaboom...and bunch of people died and it caused an environmental catastrophe of BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS...sorry...

Now there are fingers being pointed.  The government at BP, BP at the Government, the affected states at BOTH OF THEM.  And get this...Chris Dodd actually tried to blame GEORGE BUSH. I got a big finger for all of you.  I think you now which one I'm talking about!!

CONGRATULATIONS!
You are now the proud owner of almost $118,000 in DEBT courtesy of OUR FEDERAL GOVERNMENT!  That is the amount each American owes to pay down out national debt that just went over $13 TRILLION DOLLARS...I'm not sure how many zeros that is...and I'm not sure I'd have room for it so...how does THAT make you feel?  Our debt is now 90% of our GDP.  In other words, if your annual income is $100...you have to pay out $90 for all your debts...leaving you a whopping TEN BUCKS...go have a good time.

HOW BOUT THE BRAIN STRETCHER?
83 New York City bus drivers took an average of two paid months off last year after this happened?  See the answer below.

WHAT TRANSPARENCY?

What was I talking about yesterday?  Why aren't we asking WHY!  Well, apparently, SOME of the White House press corps ARE starting to ask...WHY, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, WHO...FINALLY!!!
And guess what...WHITE HOUSE PRESS SECRETAY, ROBERT GIBBS DID...he scolded the press corps for ASKING TOO MANY QUESTIONS!!  WHAAA?  The administration that said it would be the MOST TRANSPARENT in White House in history DOES NOT WANT YOU TO ASK QUESTIONS?  You afraid of the questions or the answers?   This TRANSPARENT administration is totally devoid of any transparency, I see. 

WHY TANSPARENCY?
I remember back in the old USSR days...I went there in 1976 before the fall of Communism...yeah, I know, I sound like an old geezer but... there were only TWO newspapers there then.  Pravda and Izvestia.  One of them meant "news" and the other meant "information."  I'm not sure which is which now... but... the joke in Moskow then was, "There is no Pravda in Izvestia and there is no Izvestia in Pravda."  Yeah, I know those Russian comics were a SCREAM.  The point is this:
The reason the USSR kept people in the dark is because they were easier to handle that way. 
As soon as there was a free flow of ideas then dissent could arise.  Without it the same old NON TRUTH could be continue to be passed off as fact and its acceptance was subservience.  An ignorant mass is a calm mass and we're all DUMB MASSES if we just nod and accept that they are telling us.  (Pun intended)

OH BUT WAIT!
OH, but the really BIG news is...NICOLE SHERZINGER won DANCING WITH THE STARS!! 

Nicole Sherzinger...yeah, I know, me too.  She's a PUSSY CAT DOLL.  A PUSSY CAT DOLL...yeah...I know... they are an international recording, performing, dancing neuvo version of the Spice Girls... or like The Spice Girls LITTLE SISTERS! 

Lots of cleavage, booty, girating and pelvic thrusts...not that there is anything wrong with that...

AND TONIGHT...AMERICAN IDOL...THEY PICK THE WINNER.  Yeah, I know...me too...

OH, AND BACHERLORETTE HAS STARTED...you've seen that, haven't you?  Sort of legalized prostitution in soft core on prime time network TV...are we lucky  to have so much to take us away from our boring daily existences of trying to pay down our share of that $118 G?

THE BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER:
83 New York City bus drivers took an average of two paid months off last year after this happened.

After they were spat upon by angry riders

Spitting is considered an assault under the drivers' union contract. That entitles them to take a paid break.

The Metropolitan Transportation Authority said Monday that 83 drivers were spat on last year. Of those, 51 took an average of 64 paid days off. One driver took 191 days of paid leave.

The drivers made up one-third of the number of transit workers who took time off due to assaults.

The drivers' union says the encounters cause psychological trauma, because workers they may contract a disease or be assaulted again. They say all cases are cleared by a transit agency doctor.

That's it...

DO YOU GET HE FEELING WE'RE LOSING A GRIP ON REALITY?
Is it just me or does the world seem to be spinning in a direction and at a speed that needs to be STOPPED? 
*Oil gushing into the Gulf now for THIRTY FIVE DAYS and no end in sight!

*We could be inching closer to WAR with NORTH KOREA!     

 *Iran is making US dance to its tune.

*OUR US PRESIDENT TELLS WEST POINT GRADUATES HE'S WORKING ON "A NEW INTERNATIONAL ORDER"!?! And NO ONE questions it?

AND JUST WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?

I know, the thing on the left is HILLARY...but why is she dressed like those OTHER TWO THINGS?
These androgenyous things are the symbols of the London Olympic Games...and I just...never mind.  Suffice it to say, I'll bet they would not last long if they walked into a Manchester pub!!

Watch Alpha's 5 Minute View of the World above.  A world without LIES is a world without TRUTH.
Serial MIS-SPEAKERS are the death of truth.

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER QUESTION
Dog owners name their dogs after THIS FOOD more than any other food.  What food name is that?
See the answer below.


THERE IS SOME GOOD NEWS...TAKE CHOCOLATE FOR WRINKLES !!
The world's largest chocolate maker says it may have come up with a chocolate bar that could fight wrinkles and slow the aging process, making it the latest food group to join the fight for healthier living.  Studies carried out by Swiss chocolate maker, Barry Callebaut, say that eating a half ounce of chocolate every day may help prevent wrinkles and make skin more radiant by boosting elasticity and improving hydration. Dark chocolate has already been linked with health benefits, such as helping to lower blood pressure and reducing the risk of strokes thanks to its high content of antioxidants.  Now the group has found a way to preserve the flavanols found in cocoa beans during the chocolate-making
process, allowing them to produce a bar that is richer in flavanols, which in turn, can aid in blood flow, improving memory and skin health. news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20100520/od_nm/us_chocolate_wrinkles

Of course a POUND OF CHOCOLATE A DAY will get rid of wrinkles, too...well sort of...it will fill 'em up with fat...

THAT'S THE BODY STRETCHER...HERE'S THE BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER:
OREO! 
Of course, in today's world, many DO NOT consider OREOS a food...others STILL consider it a FOOD GROUP!!


That's it. 

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MORE GREECE IN YOU PANTS, WE TELL CHINA JUST HOW SORRY WE REALLY ARE, WOODY SUPPORTS A RAPIST AND WANTS OBAMA TO BE A DICTATOR AND NANCY PELOSI SAYS FOR EVERYBODY TO JUST QUIT YOUR JOBS AND START PAINTING LANDSCAPES...OR BE A DANCER!

BUT FIRST, YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER QUESTION:
According to researchers, toddlers who do this are more likely to do well later in life.

INSANITY RULES THE WORLD RIGHT NOW...EVIDENCE...

WANT A LITTLE GREECE IN YOUR PANTS? 

We spent billions of dollars of YOUR money to help bail out Greece and the Euro...which Germany admits is just a TEMPORARY FIX... Since then the Euro has fallen even farther and now GREECE says it wants to SUE US...BECAUSE WE DIDN'T GIVE ENOUGH!

INSANITY  PART DUH...
WE'RE SORRY...BOY WE ARE REALLY SORRY!!

We, the US apologized to CHINA for our HUMAN RIGHTS VIOLATION for the Arizona Immigration law?  SERIOUSLY?   On WHAT BASIS does CHINA deserve an apology?  CHINA...one of the WORLD'S BIGGEST VIOLATORS OF HUMAN RIGHTS...CHINA...who has a ONE CHILD policy aggressively enforced on its population...who suppresses dissent at every turn...who censors news, Christians, the internet, and throws people in RE-EDUCATION CAMPS... etc.
And WHO AUTHORIZED THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT to speak for the people of ARIZONA?  It was a LAW, properly passed by the governing body of that state...I don't think they needed anyone apologizing on their behalf. 
If there was any offense, it was not to CHINA...IT'S PEOPLE OR IT'S GOVERNMENT. 
Message to HU...remember, he's the PRESIDENT OF CHINA...yeah, if he went to work for the World Health Organization, he'd be WHO'S HU...anyway, to HU it may concern, next time you round up protesters and somehow allow them to DIE IN JAIL, we'll expect a call to us to say...SO SORRY, MAN.  And then what?  Well, after our apology, I guess it's supposed to be alright, then, right? And we'll just go, OK, YOU KNUCKLEHEADS...don't do it again, now...get outtahere...

Do you see just how SORRY that makes us look!?! 

OK...THE AMERICAN LEFT HAS GONE NUTS, TOO...RIGHT HERE AT HOME..PART ONE:
MAKE OBAMA A DICTATOR?

Woody Allen is suggested that Barack Obama just become DICTATOR so he would not have to deal with any opposition for any of his ideas.  HE WAS SERIOUS.  He thought if Obama was dictator for a couple of years, "HE COULD GET SOME THINGS DONE."
Yeah, that's what we need A DICTATOR.  ARE YOU AN IDIOT!?!
That defies ANY logic and clearly portrays just how INSANE AND OUT OF TOUCH this HOLLYWOOD crowd has become. 

THE LEFT HAS GONT NUTS...PART DUH! NANCY SAYS QUIT YOUR JOB!

Nancy Pelosi...THE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES...says if you just want to QUIT YOUR JOB and SCREW OFF for a few years, go ahead and do it... everybody else will pay for YOUR HEALTH CARE!! 
BRILLIANT!!
Let's EVERYBODY QUIT AND LET NANCY take care of our HEALTH CARE...and pay my mortgage, too...and keep my fridge stocked...and pay for my beer and you better throw in a wide screen HD TV, too!

MAYBE A LITTLE SANITY?
Three highly contested SENATE PRIMARIES are being held today.  In Pennsylvania Arlen may become just a SPECTER. 

Kentucky may run RAND and Arkansas just may trade in its LINCOLN.  What happens today COULD bode VERY BADLY FOR THE CURRENT ADMINISTRATION and  VERY GOOD FOR THE COUNTRY.  More on that tomorrow.

NOW YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER:
According to researchers, toddlers who do this are more likely to do well later in life. Answer:

Lie!

The complex brain processes involved in formulating a lie are an indicator of a child's early intelligence, they add.

A Canadian study of 1,200 children aged two to 17 suggests those who are able to lie have reached an important developmental stage.

Only a fifth of two-year-olds tested in the study were able to lie.

But at age four, 90% were capable of lying, the study found. The rate increases with age to a peak at age 12. 'Developmental milestone'

The director of the Institute of Child Study at Toronto University, Dr Kang Lee, said: "Parents should not be alarmed if their child tells a fib. It is a sign that they have reached a new developmental milestone." Those who have better cognitive development lie because they can cover up their tracks."

That' it.
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GOOD NEWS...ABOUT BAD NEWS...WE'RE JUST LIKE GREECE!
Here's some great news...noted British economic minds are beginning to warn the the US is treading the same ROAD TO ECONOMIC DISASTER AS GREECE.  Major problem...DEBT TO LARGE TO PAY OFF.  And what do WE do?  We keep adding more debt.  We found out just the other day that our deficit for this year would be FOUR TIMES WHAT IT WAS LAST YEAR AND ... twice what it was PROJECTED TO BE.  And then there's the little issue of miscalculation of the health care bill... looks like the CBO just forgot to calculate some figures or SOMEBODY IN CONGRESS OR THE WHITE HOUSE failed to give them the correct numbers.  At any rate, that little number is going to be an ADDITIONAL $115 BILLION! 
THEN ADD IN THE NEW AMERICAN POWER BILL...OR CAP AND TAX...AND THANKS FOR NUTHIN BILL.
Just like GREECE...OH, and by the way, the trillion dollar bailout that was supposed to help the Euro...it's NOW BELOW IT'S 14-MONTH LOW! THAT really didn't work out so well, huh?
Check out the article at: blogs.telegraph.co.uk/finance/edmundconway/100005657/us-faces-same-problems-as-greece-says-bank-of-england/
And THIS just in...now FRANCE is threatening to PULL OUT OF THE EU...DUMP THE EURO...wow!!

OK, WITH THAT...HOW ABOUT YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER FOR TODAY
New study says that for women, it may be fun and exciting for those who do it but it actually SHORTENS your lives.  What is it?  See the answer below.


NOT A GOOD DAY TO BE THE ATTORNEY  GENERAL OF THE US...IF YOU'RE ERIC HOLDER
First he got pinned down in a congressional hearing about the Arizona Immigration law that he spoke out against on the Sunday TV talk shows.  When asked by one of the Senators, Mr. Holder admitted that he HADN'T EVEN READ THE BILL.  It was pointed out that he bill was ONLY 10 PAGES LONG...17 WITH ADDENDUM ...don't you think you could have TAKEN THE TIME TO READ the BILL before you started talking about FILING LAWSUITS AGAINST IT?  I mean you don't even KNOW what the bill SAYS...how do you know what's in it that you don't like?  LEGALLY SPEAKING, that is... I know you just don't like the bill politically but LEGALLY.

And LATER Mr. Holder was ASKED repeatedly if POSSIBLY Radical Islam could have been JUST ONE of the issues that needs to be considered when combating terrorism.  Specifically the question was about the attempted bombing at Times Square.  THREE TIMES the Attorney General was asked if RADICAL ISLAM could have played a part and EVERY TIME, he refused to site is as a cause.
Let's see...the guy TRAINED in Pakistan under the TALIBAN...they're radical...and they're Islamic...hmmm, seems pretty cut and dried to me.

OH AND SPEAKING OF ISLAM...REMEMBER THE BOOBQUAKE GUY FROM IRAN?

Iranian Cleric Kazen Sedighi is standing by his statements that loose women cause earthquakes.  But he says maybe God is holding off on big earthquakes so those truly sinful nations (like us) can continue to sin and earn a place in the "BOTTOM OF HELL." 
Oooooookaaaaayyy....

MAO GOOD MOM BAD?  IS THAT THE MESSAGE?
This defies all logic and sensibilities regardless of your spiritual or religious convictions.  Mother Terrsa would be 100 years old this month.  Catholics petitioned the Empire State Building to show a special color display to honor the annaversary...they said NO!
Now THAT wouldn't rile me EXCEPT...the landmark building went all out to honor China and MAO TSE TENG just a few weeks ago on the anniversary of THE COMMUNIST REVOLUTION IN CHINA.

Let's compare... Mother Terrsa lived a life of poverty and sacrifice while treating lepers in Cdlcutta, India.
Chairman MAO literally KILLED 10 MILLION of his fellow countrymen in order to establish his Communist rein of terror in China...a country that bashes baby girls into trees because the parents wanted a boy...a country that traffics in kidnapped NKoeran women, whom they sell to farmers for $1500!
which of those people do YOU think deserved the honor?  Hmm?  Yeah, me too!

AND YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER
Bad news for COUGARS...women who MARRY YOUNGER MEN DIE SOONER.  Hmm, and the bigger the age difference, the more her lifespan is shortened.  Oh the other hand, MEN who marry younger women live longer. 
Life is just not FAIR, huh, ladies?

MMM, THAT'S GOD CHOW...


News from outer space.  Chinese astronaut, Yang Liwei admit to eating DOG while up on their space craft.  What, no CATS available?  What's next EACH OTHER?
China's first man in space ran down his menu, quite proudly.  Shark fin, abalone, braised chicken, steamed fish..dog.  Wow...guess he's looking forward next time to smoked manatee and fricasseed grandma.

OK, HERE'S YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER
Here's your Brain Stretcher Question:  You are most likely to be a DANGEROUS DRIVER if you are a member of THIS profession...which professoin is that? 
Well, let's see how the government is tying scam us and control our lives today: 

OK, LET'S SEE HOW THE GOVERNMENT IS SCAMMING US TODAY
First off, a new banking bill sets up a SUPER SNOOPING AGENCY...DESIGNED TO SNOOP ON YOU!!  Under the guise of CONSUMER PROTECTION, the bill pushed by Senator CHRIS DODD...
remember him?  He's the chairman of the SENATE BANKING COMMITTEE who said that Freddy Fay and Fanny Pack were perfectly healthy...and who by the way, got a nice SWEETHEART loan from Countrywide...ALLEGEDLY...because the CONGRESS has not fully investigated the matter...he REMAINS, however un-indicted
Anyway, the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau would collect ALL YOUR CONSUMER TRANSACTIONS and track them to determine your buying patterns, which with an easy little connect can display all your personal data.  Thanks BIG BROTHER.

THEN THERE'S THE CLIMATE SCAM...
As I told you yesterday, the CAP AND TRADE bill was introduced...but they aren't calling it Cap and Trade...too many people are familiar with that term and KNOW that it means you would be required to TAKE OFF YOUR CAP, BEND OVER AND TRADE YOUR DIGNITY, AND YOUR LIFE for this INCREDIBLE SCAM.
Now the bill is called "The American Power Bill."  It is guaranteed to INCREASE your POWER BILL but let me tell you something, it will take away all of AMERICA'S POWER...BILL...Jim...Tom...Joe, Jane...whoever you are.

WHAT'S THE MATTER, YOU CALCULATORS NOT GO UP TO A BILLION?
Oh, and by the way...that DEFICIT of ours...here in the US... it's FOUR TIMES HIGHER THAN IT WAS A YEAR AGO!
And a year ago, it was the HIGHEST IT HAD EVER BEEN!! 
Officials say, "There were FIVE FRIDAYS in April which helped account for higher outlays.  Um hmmm...so that extra FRIDAY was enough to cause the deficit to be FOUR TIMES HIGHER THAN IT WAS FORECAST? 
I am not a smart man, but I know what BS is, Jenny...

A LITTLE LECTURE FROM THE RUSSIAN BEAR...

And RUSSIA gave the White House an ear-full yesterday...and other western nations a good old warning...NOT TO IMPOSE SANCTIONS ON IRAN.  Oh, that's nice.  Russia KNOWS we have no teeth anymore and are flexing their strong muscles because they are strong like ox and we are puny like dog...that gets eaten in space...nice.

ANYBODY WANT TO BUY A SLIGHTLY USED PRESIDENT....ANYONE?

And finally this...HILLARY CLINTON is offering BILL up as a LOTTERY PRIZE in order to pay for HER campaign debts. She owes $771 G...since leaving office the Clintons have earned OVER 109 MILLION DOLLARS, through speaking fees, book royalties and god knows what else...
So, if you have any work to do around the house...a little dusting, some painting, a little bribery...then you might want to get in on this action. BUT DON'T LET HIM ANYWHERE NEAR YOUR MAID...OUR YOUR COLLEGE AGE DAUGHTERS.   I wouldn't even let him near the good silver or the liquor cabinet, to be honest with you.

GRANDPA IS RIGHT NEXT TO THE LETTUCE... 
OH, and this...a Brazilian doctor says he's come up with a PILL that will let you live to be 100 and then die healthy.  WHAT'S THE POINT OF THAT?  If you're healthy, you don't want to just cash in your chips...do ya?  That's like putting a SELL BY DATE ON GRANDPA.  Like food in the fridge you know is going bad in a week.
You know, grandpa...you're not going to need this apartment after next week...you think I could have it for a bachelor pad?  Man...we're not too far from SOILENT GREEN, I TELL YA!

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER:
If you do THIS for a living, you are most likely to drive dangerously...A JUDGE OR AN ATTORNEY...sure you've already got the right people to bribe on speed dial.
Here's the rest of the top 10:
2.  Financial professionals
3.  Government worker (GS6)
4.  Bartender or Waiter
5.  Other Professional
6.  Dog Groomer
7.  Marketing/Advertising
8.  Barber/Stylist
9.  Coach
10. Nurse


that's it
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REMEMBER THE SCENES FROM THE WESTERNS?
You know the ones with the cowboys in the canyon and the Indians all around the rim...far as the eye can see and you jut thnk to yourself...nothing GOOD is coming of THIS?  You ever feel that way?  Yeah, me too.

Find out why in Alpha's 5 Minute View of the World above.
A LICENSE TO BELCH
WHO TAXES YOU AND I DON'T KNOW WHY!
CAN ONE WORD CAUSE DIVORCE?

NEWS CLOSE TO HOME

The spill gets a new TOP HAT.  That is what they are calling the slimmed down version of the huge concrete condom that failed to slow the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.  Ice crystals formed and ended the attempt.  This new HAT is supposed to eliminate that issue...let's hope so.  If it does we can get the tux and tails later.

BARACK TOLD RUSH HE COULD "PLAY WITH HIMSELF?"  REALLY?
Since Barack is the GOLF-PLAYING-EST PRESIDENT EVER, it was suggested that he play around with his radio nemesis, Rush Limbaugh...who is also an avid golfer.
Apparently, Mr. Obama did not take too kindly to the suggestion.   He replied, "Rush can PLAY WITH HIMSELF." 
You don't think he meant...NAAHHH!

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
Supreme Court nominee, Elena Kagen will be under further scrutiny this week as she lobbies for votes in the Senate for confirmation.  Some outlets are reporting that she once advocated that the GOVERNMENT REDISTRIBUTION OF SPECH."  What does THAT mean?  I do want to find out because it does NOT sound good on the face of it.
NO APOLOGIES NECESSARY...
The Wall Street Journal is DENYING that it was IMPLYING that the potential Supreme was...shall we say...MANLY... by printing a photo of her playing softball.  Some groups SENSITIVE to those issues claimed that the paper was calling her a lesbian.  Now THAT'S a bit of a leap, don't you think?  I mean I don't think the would...do you...NAHHH!

HOW ABOUT WE STRETCH YOUR BRAIN FOR A SECOND...
According to British papers, THIS WORD appears in one of every 5 divorce proceedings filed.  What one word is that?  See the answer below:

AND SINCE WE'RE OVER THE POND...THE UK HAS A NEW PM
He is David Cameron...a Tory...a Conservative.  And now he has to form a coalition with the Labor Party (the party of Gordon Brown, who just stepped down as PM) or the Democratic Labor Party, headed by Nick Clegg.  That party is not particularly fond of us YANKS...or so I'm told.  Curious bedfellows. 

HOW DO YOU GROUND A 16 YEAR-OLD WHO MAKES MORE THAN YOU?
Miley Cyrus certainly NEEDS grounding for this but...

At the wrap party of her last movie, this is how she behaved....giving a LAP DANCE to her 44 year-old DIRECTOR.  Ooookay....
So, whaddaya do, there Billy Ray?  And by the way have you seen just how raunchy our music videos are getting these days?  Have you seen Christina Aguilera's latest?  WOW. 
See what I mean by the cowboys and Indians thing, now?

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER:
That ONE WORD is FACEBOOK.  Hmm...seems that the social networking site is a site for other fun stuff, too...enough to cause a family feud or two. 

AND THEN THERE'S THIS...
Israel is reporting that NORTH KOREA is supplying WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION TO SYRIA.  AND...Russia is supplying Syria with NUCLEAR TECHNOLOGY. 
NOW do you see what I mean by the COWBOYS AND INDIANS?  YEAH?

AND THIS TOO...
And the OBESITY TASK FORCE could be coming for your desert!  The White House's fatty swat team wants to GET CONTROL of food marketing.  Are you kidding me?  Does the government need to CONTROL EVERYTHING?   One community already ordered that McDonalds quit putting toys in HAPPY MEALS...
So ya better watch out.  The FATSO SWAT TEAM may be kicking down your door shouting, "PUT DOWN THAT HO HO AND SLOWLY BACK AWAY!!"
Oh, so NOW you see what I mean by the COWBOYS...TOLD YA!

that's it...
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TWO STORIES ABOUT SENIORS...THE YOUNG KIND AND THE OLDER KIND...NEITHER MAKES SENSE!
STORY 1...YOUNG SENIORS...YOUR IPODS ARE DANGEROUS!
President Barack Obama was the graduation ceremony speaker at Hampton University in Hampton, Virginia.  Normally at such speeches, one lays out the future before the grads, telling them how it is their turn to go out and make their dreams come true.  That it is time to put to work all those wonderful things the university has taught them and that they CAN be the light of the world...bla, bla, bla...
Well, in this address, the president told the gathered matriculators that they shouldn't get their information from their iPods an iPads and X-Boxes, claiming that some of the information they could receive from the "internet" could be harmful to the country...here is an excerpt:

"You're coming of age in a 24/7 media environment that bombards us with all kinds of content and exposes us to all kinds of arguments, some of which don't always rank all that high on the truth meter."

"With iPods and iPads and Xboxes and PlayStations, -- none of which I know how to work -- information becomes a distraction, a diversion, a form of entertainment, rather than a tool of empowerment, rather than the means of emancipation."

... "some of the craziest claims can quickly claim traction,"...pointing a finger at blogs and talk radio.

"All of this is not only putting new pressures on you, it is putting new pressures on our country and on our democracy."

Now, I'm not sure what info you get from your PLAYSTATION but that is a pretty odd admonition coming from a guy who is admittedly adicted to his CRACKBERRY!

Information...a DISTRACTION?  Since WHEN is information a BAD thing?  You're talking to kids who've GROWN UP with these things in their hands, Mr. President...ya think they're just going to put them down because YOU say so?  If that's the case, then your message is more dangerous than all the gizmos you're talking about!
Education is about reasonable, sensible discourse and learning to discern good and bad through INFORMATION...taking away, censoring or demonizing one or another source of information is a form of totalitarianism that damages "our Democracy" far more than the ideas themselves.

STORY 2: OLD SENIORS...YOU CAN'T SAY GRACE!!
At a home for elderly near Savannah, Georgia, the big bad GOVERNMENT told THE SENIOR CITIZENS at the Ed Young Senior Citizens Center that they could not pray out loud before a meal!
WHAT!?!  IN AMERICA?  THE GOVERNMENT CAN TELL US WE CAN'T PRAY?
Senior Citizens Inc spokesperson Tim Rutherford claimed it was the RULE that, since this meal is provided for and subsidized by a government program, any prayer before consuming it would be considered a VIOLATION OF CHURCH AND STATE! 
ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!  Just because the meal, which cost 6 bucks and which the seniors only pay 55 cents..you're telling these senior AMERICANS that they can't say grace like they've probably done all their lives?
This is still America, right!?!

Well...after the media got hold of this story, guess what happened!  The "no prayer edict" was reversed!  I don't think it mattered much because these feisty seniors had pretty much decided they were going to PRAY ANY WAY!!
Can we PLEASE find some common sense in this world? 

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER
Studies say that when you look at this, your blood pressure immediately drops...what are you looking at?
See the answer below:

CHECKING OUT OF 10 DOWNING STREET

British PM Gordon Brown says he'll step down...in September!  I understand he's not all that popular there these days...so...why stretch it out so long?  If you're gonna go...sooner is better than later, right?  Like a house guest promising to leave...next month...or maybe the month after...
What's former PM to do?  Oh, I guess make a lot of money on the speaking circuit, lobby for high profile companies, write a book with a huge up-front royalty and charge large consulting fees...WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

AND LOOK WHO JUST CHECKED BACK IN!

After being out of sight in the Philippines since 1992, former first lady to Ferdinand Marcos, Imelda Marcos has returned to Manila.  Her son Bongbong, was elected to the Senate there.  Yeah, Bongbong!
You may remember her when she was exiled with her plundered wealth and thousands of pairs of shoes.  You may ALSO remember that there were EMAIL scams asking to help her get all the gold out of the Philippines.  For a small sum...say a thousand dollars or so, you could show your good faith and once the gold was OUT...you'd get a share of it.  Remember that?  You fall for it?  Yeah, me neither...DAMN YOU...GIVE ME MY $50 MILLION IN GOLD LIKE YOU PROMISED YOU... OH..sorry...

OK...YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER
If you look at this your blood pressure drops instantly...
THE OCEAN

Unless of course, you're looking at where the ocean meets the GULF OF MEXICO...then you're likely to sense a SPIKE on your pressure...no answers yet and it looks like it may be days or weeks...or worse before the answers DO come.  Sorry to say...

That's it.
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AMAZING WHAT A TRILLION DOLLARS CAN DO...
(Maybe fix up this drafty old place?)
The IMF, International Monetary Fund has kicked a TRILLION DOLLARS into the European Community to help bail out Greece and soften the blow created by their potential default.  Not far behind are Spain and Portugal so to stabilize their economies and jolt international markets the IMF, with a huge pile from the US, did jump start the markets, at least.
In the US, the DOW is up over 400 points at last check and the short term effect is working.
Long term?  It will only be good if we learn a lesson from the Greeks who favored unions, taxed workers, created generous retirements, handouts, entitlements and services, all while depleting the incentive of business to create jobs and generate revenue.  THAT is exactly what we are doing here.  If we can LEARN from this and NOT follow the expample...then MAYBE we, too can avoid this:


THE NEXT SUPREME?

President Barack Obama has nominated this woman...Elena Kagen, current Solicitor General of the US to the position of Supreme Court Justice.  Though without judicial experience, she is not without credentials.  In addition to her post in the Judiciary, she's also served as a Supreme Court clerk and the Dean of the Harvard Law School.
It is there, however that she may get the most attention regarding her past. While Dean of that school. she had the US Military recruiters KICKED OFF CAMPUS.  The speculation is that she objected to the military's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy.  THAT fuels speculation that Kagen is a lesbian...but so far as I know, no one has asked and she's not tellin'.  But if I were a BETTIN' man...NOT THAT THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT!!

WORLD CUP...PUT A CONDOM ON IT...
The World Cup...the global championship of football or SOCCER, as we call it is bracing for a LOT of scoring.  Oh, not ON the field...or the PITCH, as they call it...but OFF THE PITCH. 
Host city, Johannesburg, South Africa is accepting ONE BILLION CONDOMS in advance of the event.  Apparently the cup planners are expecting a LOT of hibbidy bibbidy to go on during the games.  And since AIDS is rampant in that part of the globe, it's a good idea to promote safe sex.  And just WHO will be taking part in this off-field activity?  Well, the city is preparing for 40,000 sex workers to arrive.  These nice young ladies...or so we'd like to imagine, will be vying for the attention of the 400.000 MOSTLY MALE fans who are expected to attended the matches, drink, get in fights and then have sex. 
A BILLION CONDOMS...40,000 CONDOM TECHNICIANS.... Now, let's do a little math, here... we will assume that not JUST the sex workers will be taking advantage of the condoms...fair enough?  I mean there will, no doubt be some willing women who are NOT charging and some of the men may just want to have a little fun with EACH OTHER...not that there is anything wrong with that.  So, let's assume double the number of sex workers...and say 80,000 will be needing raincoats for whatever reason.  Assuming that, it works out to 12,000 condoms A PIECE!!  No pun intended!
Assuming no RE-uses or at least minimal  for a two-week event, assuming it IS a two-week event, somebody will be burning through condoms at the rate of 893 PER DAY.
Assuming, again that they want to make the most of their time, they'll work a 8 hour day...no breaks...that's 111 condoms per hour...that means they're serving 1.85 satisfied customers per minute.  I guess the .85 would be little people...don't know for sure but that allows little time for undressing, dressing, Hi, how ya doin? that sort of thing. 
See, if there were THIS much scoring going on ON the field, we Americans would probably like the sport more but any game that can, potentially end nil-nil is just not very exciting to us.  So, enjoy the Cup and al that comes with it...again...no pun...never mind.

That is it.
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THE STOCK MARKET WAS A WILD RIDE...

OH, WAIT...SORRY, THAT WAS THE UPSIDE DOWN ROLLER COASTER FROM THE OTHER DAY...
Riders were stuck UPSIDE DOWN for TWENTY MINUTES...talk about blood rushing to your head...


BUT...THE STOCK MARKET SEEMED LIKE A WILD ROLLER COASTER...LOT OF BLOOD THERE, TOO!


It dropped over 1000 points in a matter of a few minutes just because SOMEBODY at CITI Bank, ALLEGEDLY, hit a "B" instead of a "M" when executing a trade.  Instead of trading a MILLION SHARES, the trade went out as A BILLION SHARES...THAT, as you can imagine sent a SHOCK through the trade floor and sent everyone into a panic.  The NAME of the precise trader has not been released as of yet...guess they want to shelter that poor boob from lawsuits.  You just KNOW that a LOT OF PEOPLE LOST A LOT OF MONEY ON THE DAY.  AND...a lot of people MADE a lot of money on the day...AND THAT will fuel speculation that it was all manipulated.  Makes you wonder, huh?

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER QUESTION:
Second only to the DAY AFTER Valentine's Day, the day AFTER Mother's Day is the most popular day for women to do this.  What are they doing?
Find the answer below:

FINALLY...SOME COMMON SENSE
Navy Seal, Matthew McCade was ACQUITTED of all charges in the court martial for "abusing a detainee."
The "detainee" was a dirt bag terrorist who KILLED AND DESECRATED THE BODIES OF 4 AMERICAN CONTRACTORS IN FALUJAH.  McCade was the last of three Seals to be acquitted of giving the lowlife a fat lip...shouldda gotten a lot worse. 
Why the court martial ever happened in the first place is a mystery to me.

OOPS...RIGHT BACK TO NO COMMON SENSE!
Remember a week or so ago, Comedy Central...ordered that Its cartoon writers, Matt Stone and Trey Parker NOT mention of Muhammad in a recent "South Park" episode.  The cartoon broke a RULE of Islam that The Prophet NOT be depicted in any way.  The Network reacted to threats by an Islanic web site that hinted that the same thing could happen to Stone and Parker ad happened to Dutch filmmaker Theo Van Gogh for a similar offense!  He was found with a knife sticking in his eye. 
The Network caved and ordered the show censored so as NOT to offend Islam.
But just LOOK at what the network is working on NOW... A Jesus Christ cartoon!
This is an image of Jesus from a previous "South Park" cartoon which The Comedy Channel, obviously did NOT care if the cartoon offended CHRISTIANS!
Something tells me this will not be a flattering depiction of Christ or Christians...so why is it OK to offend Christians but not Muslims?  Are the not afraid Christians will declare some sort of religious FATWA?
Why is THIS OK?  Hmm?

SCIENTIST SAY WE'VE ALL GOT A LITTLE NEANDERTHAL IN US
Scientists, able to unravel the DNA of Neanderthal Man, has determined that most ALL of us have some of that lifeline in us.  Some 60,000 years ago, some advanced hominid species, including HUMANS, did the hibbidy bibbidy with some Neanderthals...guess even THEN chicks went for the BAD BOYS.  This study figures that the lineage of Neanderthal Man never really died out, it just evolved into more highly developed species and exists in ALL OF US TO THIS DAY !
Ahhh...maybe we haven't evolved all THAT MUCH, AFTER ALL!!

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER:
The day AFTER Mother's Day is the SECOND most popular day for women to sign up for ONLINE DATING SITES! 
So says AshleyMadison, the online dating site for married people, who tells momlogic.com that while they normally get 2,500 to 3,000 new women signing up for their services on an average Monday, last year they got 24,000 new sign-ups the day after Mother's Day (this year they're expecting 30,000 new enrollments).

Why is this? The usual reasons. Inattentive spouses make their significant others feel unloved, unappreciated and taken for granted by not celebrating how fabulous they are and making them feel extra special.
 
THAT'S IT...ENJOY YOUR MOTHER'S DAY!
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ATHENS, GREECE...BIRTHPLACE OF DEMOCRACY...NOW THE MOB RULES BY FIRE

Greek authorities try to stop the violent protest from labor unions, anarchists and other radical groups protesting the economic situation that grips that nation.  This police officer was set aflame by a Molitov cocktail, thrown by protesters.  (So much for a PEACEFUL protest, huh?) Meanwhile the entire European Union seems to be troubled. Spain and Portugal are in dire financial straits, as well and the UK is poised for a deadlocked Parliament with no party garnering enough members to be the ruling majority.

THE GULF MAY BE BURNING AGAIN, TOO...

Administration officials plan to ignite oil floating in the Gulf of Mexico once again.  That coupled with the lowering of a 100-ton concrete cap over the leak area are hoped to stem to amount and flow of oil from last week's explosion. 
Finger-pointing, accusations and blame are mounting as some fingers point to a sweetheart deal between the Obama administration and the cluprit, British Petroleum.  Some are suggesting that BP got some special consideration and were allowed to avoid certain hoop-jumping because the oil company has been the single largest contributor to Obama's campaigns over the past decade.  That DOES bear some explaining, don't you think?

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER QUESTION
The British Government was the first to recognize and honor this...now you do it, too...not all the time but once a year.  What is it?   See the answer below.

NASHVILLE IS DRYING OUT
With the spill in the Gulf and the would-be bomber in NY, we've seemed to have forgotten the poor people of Tennessee.  As the flood waters recede, residents are returning to destroyed homes and lives and new victims are being discovered.  Please remember those poor people and your donations to the American Red Cross, are of course, always welcome and appreciated.

WHY WAS THIS SHIRT DEEMED OFFENSIVE?

Find who thinks so and why by watching Alpha's 5 Minute Morning Video...it's at the top of this page.

AND...
Find out who want's "EVERYTHING TO BE EQUAL IN EVERYBODY'S HOUSE." 

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER ANSWER:
It was the British Government who first recognized the national celebration of MOTHER'S DAY. 
And by the way...THAT IS THIS SUNDAY. DON'T FORGET MOM! 
And...just wondering...are DAD'S responsible for buying something for the wife on MOTHER'S DAY?  She's not his mother, right?  Hmm?

That is it.
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THE WORLD IS A MESS...


The GULF... 


NASHVILLE...

WAL-MART...
Sorry about THAT one...

YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER...
Doctors in SPAIN say a man doing THIS as little as 5 minutes can cause increased stress and damage to his heart.  What is he doing?   See the answer below...


BACK TO THE GULF...
BP says it will pay for "CUSTOMARY COSTS" of cleanup of the Gulf of Mexico...you know that THAT means...the LAWSUITS will last FOR-EVER!

WOULD BE BOMBER CAUGHT TRYING TO GET BACK TO PAKISTAN...

FEDS, NYPD...EVERYBODY WITH ANY AUTHORITY are searching the apartment of Faisal Shahzad, the Pakistani-born American citizen.  He was captured on a flight to Dubai just before takeoff.  Now the unraveling begins tracing back all his contacts, here and around the globe.
He LOOKS to be a just a BIT more than a LONE, NUT JOB WITH A POLITICAL AGENDA, as Mayor Bloomberg described him...BEFORE KNOWING ANYTHING ABOUT THE BOMBER OR THE SITUATION.
OK...if we CAN'T profile, for fear of OFFENDING someone...can we LAY OFF just poo pooing it as just some WHACKO?  OK, it MAY BE some whacko but on the other hand, it MAY BE a TERRORIST...and for that matter it may be an ISLAMIC TERRORIST. 
If it is what it is...call it what it is...or call it NOTHING AT ALL.

CHECK OUT MY 5 MINUTE MORNING VIDEO to see why MY DOGS are going to accuse ME of profiling.

ANSWER TO YOUR BRAIN STRETCHER
SPENDING 5 MINUTES WITH A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN...with whom he feels is OUT OF HIS LEAGUE. 

The anxiety rate of those men is said to be similar to jumping from an aircraft. Their cortisol levels rise even higher, bringing on the possibility of a heart attack.

Experts at the University of Valencia, in Spain, paid male students to take part in an experiment that measured their cortisol levels before and after they had been left alone with an attractive woman. 

For men who get the girl, the stark reality is even worse. The study claimed that long-term relationship stress can cause "chronic" levels of cortisol, leading to impotence.

"That can have adverse effects on health as it worsens various disorders, such as myopathy, adult-onset diabetes, hypertension and impotency," the research team said.
See what you DO TO US...

THAT'S IT...
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