IT'S RAINING!!
Yeah, it's a gray, wet, gloomy day but I like it.  We were treated to a few spring-like days and now here comes the rain.  If you're hating it, just remember those days when we were PRAYING for rain.  This will make for a much nicer, more fun, more recreational, worry free summer...as far a water goes, anyway.

GLOOMY DAY IN HOLLYWOOD TOO, COREY HAIM, STAR OF "LOST BOYS' FOUND DEAD

If you were or if you raised a child of the 80s, this news is sad.  Corey Haim was found in L.A. dead of an apparent overdose...he was 38.  If you're female and of that age range, you probably had a poster of Corey in your bedroom.  You MAY have had one if you are a MALE...NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT!
The point is, his star rose very rapidly and burned brightly...for a while.  Then, as often happens in the "what have you done for me lately" world of stardom, his flame went out.  To compensate...DRUGS.  It became his new friend...his dangerous friend.  And as with all dangerous things one plays with, when not handled carefully and completely under control, it becomes the enemy and the executioner. 
Odd, in a way, that events like this come to serve as lessons.  Most times, lessons totally unheeded but ones of great value nonetheless when they are.  So many aspire to the heights that Corey Haim reached.  So many believe that to be the ultimate dream...to be a big star...to be adored by throngs of fans.  And maybe it is but then again, maybe it's only a short ride.  You must be as ready for the ride UP the roller coaster as your are for the drop down.  He was not.  Another sad ending to a Hollywood story.

OK...ROLL OUT THE THREE STOOGES...THE FEMALE VERSION...THE SHE STOOGES
First Stooge; Meagan Mariah Barnes.  She was driving to Key West at mile marker 21 when she was involved in a two-car accident.  The patrolman arriving at the scene said its' the SECOND weirdest thing he's ever covered at that very same mile marker...the other was a driver who had THREE HYPODERMIC NEEDLES STICKING IN HIS ARM. 
OK...how can THIS be weirder?  Meagan, who had JUST THE DAY BEFORE been convicted of DUI  The judge ordered her license suspended for for FIVE YEARS' her car impounded and any car she drive after that be equipped with a breathalyzer ignition.
But that did not deter Meagan...she was on her way to see her boyfriend.  Ok, so...what caused the accident?  Well it COULD HAVE BEEN that Meagan, was SHAVING HER BIKINI LINE AT THE  TIME.  Hey she was going to see her BOY FRIEND!!  Yes, doing landscaping while driving.  OH, it gets better.  Meagan's EX BOYFRIEND, OR MAYBE HUSBAND was actually handling the steering wheel from the PASSENGER SEAT.  What do you suppose HE was watching? 
Now, they are BOTH in a world of trouble...as they should be.

STOOGE NUMBER TWO
Lindsay Lohan...she is suing E*Trade for 100 MEEEEL-YUN DOLLARS!  Lindsay, another one of those potential sad Hollywood stories, is claiming that the online trading site USE HER IMAGE AND NAME in one of its TV Commercials.  You've probably seen the one...with the kid in the high chair who talks about all his stock trades over the Internet?  In this one, the kid is video conferencing with an apparent girlfriend, who is chastising him for not calling the night before.  HE claims to have been busy attacking trading deals like A WOLF.  She then asks if that "Milk-a-holic, Lindsay" was there...he's stunned by the accusation and then LINDSAY...or so we surmise pops on the screen and says, "MILK-A-WHAT?"
Ok, Lohan seems to believe that that little girl WAS HER!  She, apparently, believes that she alone has the SOLE rights to the name LINDSAY and the company use her image without permission.
This is a suit that should never have advanced beyond the idea stage...it should and probably will be summarily thrown out of court as a FRIVOLOUS lawsuit...for which the attorney can be sanctioned. 

STOOGE NUMBER THREE

Nancy Pelosi.  She is the Speaker of the House of Representatives and is getting increasingly kooky as support for the health care bill dwindles.  She did a YouTube video IMPLORING her colleagues and the public to support the bill and RAM it through Congress.  In the video she said to critics; "We need to pass this bill so you can see what's in it!"  WHAAAA?  What kind of backward logic is that? You need to TELL US WHAT'S IN IT (HONESTLY) before we can decided if you should pass it. 
Over 2000 pages...I doubt SHE knows everything in it...

AND THEN THERE'S THIS WOMAN...WE'LL CALL HER SHEMP...THE FORTH STOOGE...
JIHAD JANE...a seemingly normal suburban mom who recruited people around the world to KILL AMERICANS!!  This piece of human garbage should be dealt with in the harshest means legally available. 
She became a Muslim...OK, fine, if that's what you want to do...BUT THEN...she decided to launch her own personal jihad against AMERICA...CHRISTIANS...JEWS... AND WHOMEVER ELSE RADICAL MUSLIMS HATE AND WANT TO KILL.
She set up an internet site and recruited other sick, perverted Americans, Europeans, Asians and others to kill innocent people and people that she and her twisted sisters (and brothers) deemed insulting to Islam and or Mohammed. 
I would say all of this is ALLEGED but it seems pretty cut and dried that she's the one behind this.  She and several others around the world have been arrested and are facing charges.  And when the legal system is done, I hope she is dealt the same judgment that she and her ilk have deemed themselves worthy and lofty enough to administer.  She deserves nothing less. 


AND SO AS NOT TO BE SEXIST...THERE'S THIS GUY...WE'LL CALL HIM SUPER STOOGE!

ERIC MASSA...talk about KOOKY!?!  He's the guy who accused Rahm Emanuel of accosting him in the shower, NAKED, and poking him with his finger...well of the options available under THOSE CIRCUMSTANCES...I'd say THE FINGER was the preferable choice...from MY STANDPOINT, anyway. 
In response to the accusations he GROPED a male staffer, Massa said, YES, HE NOT ONLY GROPED HIM, HE TICKLED HIM TILL HE WAS OUT OF BREATH!"  Hmmm.  WAIT, THERE'S MORE...
Then Massa said four other guys PILED ON TOP OF HIM...IT WAS HIS (MASSA'S) BIRTHDAY AND "THEY WERE PLAYING KILL THE OLD GUY!"
Yeah...I can't tell you how many times we've played THAT one around the office...
OK, I HAVE tickled someone till they were out of breath...BUT NOT AN ADULT.  In playing with my nieces or nephews, or my little brother or my OWN KIDS AND GRANDDAUGHTER, I may have done that but after they grew up...somehow that game seemed neither fun nor appropriate.
What kind of guy tickles another guy till he's breathless?  A WEIRD GUY, that's what! 
Any credibility he has is out the window now!!  Nice goin, TICKLE BOY.


THAT'S IT FOR TODAY...
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

DARE WE DECLARE WINTER OVER?
It sure feels like SPRING!   Daffodils starting to bloom, crocus popping up, robins showing red breasts. 
OH, speaking of breasts...
Did you hear about the assault with a loaded boob?  A woman was being booked on "suspicion" of DUI and while changing into her jail jumpsuit, SQUIRTED THE JAILER IN THE FACE WITH BREAST MILK!  Who ever heard of such a thing!  Now the prisoner is charged with several counts of ASSAULT, along with her DUI arrest. 
This is obviously a RESPONSIBLE person.  She's lactating...so I GUESS that would mean she's got a baby of breastfeeding age...and she's getting drunk and driving around...VERY responsible. 

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE...KELLY'S MOM, MIDGE
(From Kelly) Here's another Midge update: It's been exactly one week today that she was admitted to Dekalb Medical and the good news is that she contuines to improve. She was in good spirits this morning despite being woken up at all hours last night by staff. Even woken up at 1am and asked if she wanted a BATH! Your prayers are working so please keep them coming.


UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE...Fascist-LOVING, Intolerant CELEBUJERK
In yesterday's blog, I talked about nice guy, Sean Penn saying anyone who criticized him should "die, screaming with rectal cancer."  Well, the bosom buddy of dictator, Hugo Chavez if Venezuela, apparently is rubbing off on Sean. 

Penn also said in that same "cancer" interview that any journalist who calls Chavez a "dictator" should be JAILED.  Wow, that's what Chavez thinks, too.  And he HAS jailed his critics...guess that's better than wishing rectal cancer on them.  BUT...jailing your critics for calling you a dictator...isn't that the very DEFINITION OF DICTATOR? 


DAN RATHER HAS SLIPPED A GROOVE
Former CBS News anchor Dan Rather, while talking to Chris Matthews of CNN, about the GOP's expected strategy against Democrats in elections this fall, said Republicans would describe President Obama as "a nice person ... very articulate" but an ineffective leader who "couldn't sell watermelons if you gave him the state troopers to flag down the traffic."

WHAT?  What does that mean?  Who is he intending to insult?  Turns out he is insulting to us all...what a stupid thing to say.  But...wait...Rather prefaced the comments by saying, "The Republicans will make a case and a lot of independents will buy this argument."

WHAT ARGUMENT?  Dan hasn't been right since he got mugged about 10 years ago...he claimed some guy beat him up as he kept repeating, "What's the frequency, Kenneth?" 
Yeah, that makes sense, too, huh? 

DRIVING A TOYOTA?  OH WHAT A FEELING...HOW'S THAT FEEL ABOUT RIGHT NOW?
There is even MORE evidence that the Toyotas are a bit of a risk.  The latest evidence came when a Prius driver on Interstate 8 in San Diego called 911, claiming he could not stop his car.  The accelerator was racing and the breaks were not stopping the vehicle as he hit speeds of over 90 mph.  A CHiPs Officer was able to locate the car, slow it down and stop it with his patrol car.  The Prius driver had just come from the Toyota dealership, where the service representative told him his care was NOT on the recall list and everything was OK...OK, why don't YOU get in the car and drive it around for a while? 
Oh and who's going to be responsible for cleaning that soiled front seat? 

WHAT IS GOING ON IN THOSE CONGRESSIONAL SHOWERS?
This man, NY Democrat Representative Eric Massa claims he is being shoved aside by the White House for his refusal to back the Obama health care plan.  THAT, he claims is what is behind accusations that he "sexually harassed" a male staff member a few months back and subsequently forced him to resign from Congers.  Massa claims it's just his "salty language" that got him in trouble. 
Regardless, his claim is that he was cornered in the Congress' gym shower by THIS MAN:
...the one nuzzling the Speaker of the House. RAHM EMANUEL. 
According to Massa, the confrontation took place with Emanuel NAKED and got heated as the two stood in the buff, nose to nose...or whatever...to whatever...you get the picture...
Since his announcement to resign his seat in Congress, Massa called Emanuel "the son of Satan's spawn."  That would make him the devil's grandson, if that accusation is correct. 
Does Glenn Back know that the GRANDSON OF THE DEVIL has access to the OVAL OFFICE?
Quick, get the chalkboard!!

READY BRAIN?

We first met THIS famous icon on this date in 1959.  Who...or what is it?

Answer: BARBIE
Barbara Millicent Roberts debuted March 9, 1959...whoo, that makes her 51 years old...wonder if they'll come out with a new COUGAR BARBIE!  Much younger Ken sold separately!

LATER

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

WOULDN'T WANT TO BE AT THE CAMERON AFTER PARTY
I am sure the Hollywood faces...the botox-free parts that could actually MOVE, that is,  were aghast last night as the DOMESTIC drama played out between ex spouses. 
James Cameron, with "Avatar"...the prohibitive favorite...the juggernaut...the blockbuster vs Katherine Bigelow and "The Hurt Locker," a movie about the Iraq War that NOBODY SAW!
                           Bigelow                                                             Cameron

                      $14.7 M Box Office                                              $720 M Box Office
In the end, WHO got the last laugh?  Well, SHE got TWO OSCARS...Best Film and Best Director.  And HE only got a few bazillion dollars...so YOU be the judge.  Either way, I'll bet HER party was more fun than HIS!  I mean you can't feel TOO SORRY for him.  If he was crying about it, I say SHUT UP!!  SHUT UP AND ENJOY YOUR EXTRA LARGE BANK ACCOUNT.

THIS IS WHY I PREFER THE RAZZIES
Call me a stick in the mud, if you like, but the Oscars just don't impress me.  A bunch of self aggrandizing, self-adoring, phonies, celebrating how wonderful and beautiful they are and presenting themselves awards for it.  Kind of like Reverend Jeremiah Wright in Chicago Friday night, PRESENTING HIMSELF with a "LIVING LEGEND AWARD?"  And CHARGING PEOPLE BIG MONEY TO COME TO THE EVENT...THAT'S watcha see when gonads meet the gullible.
 
Anyway, back to Hollywood...the whole event is about who's being seen and what they are being seen in...Halston, Dior, Wang...for MY money, there are too many people in Tinseltown WAY to proud of their WANGS as it is.   The whole orchestrated evening is badly delivered jokes about real inside stuff, weak skirts, presentations delivered by actors, who would be LOST without a script or teleprompter, phony self-deprecation and LOTS OF CLEAVAGE. 
(OK, that last part, I don't mind.)

Now the RAZZIES...this is a little ceremony that recognizes the OTHER SIDE OF HOLLYWOOD.  The SUCK side...the side that the glam would prefer you see, as long as you spend money but prefer that you don't remember.  The Razzies recognize the WORST efforts of these genius film-makers and thespians. 
One class act to come from the Razzies...Sandra Bullock showing up to good-naturedly accept her award for WORST ACTRESS...she was actually a DOUBLE winner, also winning WORST COUPLE, with some guy, for her role in "All About Steve."
She showed up, accepted the award and provided DVDs of the movie to everybody.  Now THAT'S class.

I DO DISAGREE WITH ONE THING ABOUT THE RAZZIES
While the Razzies poke fun at the self-centeredness of Hollywood, I do have to vehemently object to one presentation...WORST OF THE DECADE.  There were Razzies presented to the Worst FILM of the Decade, which went to "Spaceship Earth."  This was the HORRIBLE story, funded and starring John Travolta, which was written by L. Ron Hubbard and pretty much tells the story of the science fiction account that led to the cult religion, Scientology.  OK, I have no beef with that...it was a stinker.  BUT...worst actor and actress of the DECADE...EDDIE MURPHY?  OK, he was sucky in "Norbit."  he got a little carried away with that multiple character thing but WORST OF THE DECADE?  Whatever...BUT THIS...THIS is just a travesty...WORST ACTRESS OF THE DECADE?  PARIS HILTON?  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  I most strenuously object...to her being called an ACTRESS!   She's just kind of a celebutramp...famous for NOTHING SHE'S DONE OR EARNED.

She's more like the modern day Zsa Zsa Gabor...without all the talent...

NOW FOR A TOTAL LACK OF CLASS?
A good example of why actors should just SHUT UP AND ACT is Sean Penn.  Now, granted, he jumped RIGHT INTO ACTION when the devastating earthquake hit Haiti.  He personally delivered needed supplies and aid that was greatly appreciated.  BUT...he also brought with him a camera and crew so they could CHRONICLE the whole thing...for a future film or documentary, perhaps?
He was criticized by those who already disliked him for his politics as well as those who questioned his motives...both here AND in Haiti. 
So, does he respond in the spirit of benevolence and love that he delivered to Haiti?  NOPE!  Sean Penn appeared on the CBS Sunday Morning Show to say THIS of his critics: "I hope they all DIE SCREAMING FROM RECTAL CANCER!" 
Wow...just because they question your motives?  To ME that really puts the HATE in Haiti!

READY BRAIN?
Academy Award Film, "Gone With the Wind." Author, Margaret Mitchell did not want Clark Gable to play Rhett Butler.  Who was Mitchel's choice? 

Answer:  GROUCHO MARX! 

Couldda been a TOTALLY different film...Civil War meets "COCONUTS!" 

Later
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

FROM A FORMER LISTENER OF OURS, DAVE...

Hey guys sure hope to hear if all the rumors are correct and yall come
back.I have been listening to yall for 10 years and sure do miss you
guys. I was lucky to win a cruise from y'all on Holland America and coke
contest some years back and will never forget. The radio station will
sure get my emails about bringing y'all back.

Thanks
A faithful listener
Dave

My reply:
Hey David,
Thanks for your email...nice to hear from you. Thanks, too, for the kind words.  
We certainly miss being back on the air and we are grateful that we created a
memory for you and that we can still count you among our loyal fans.
We won't be going back any time soon, either, I'm afraid.  There were a lot of 
RUMORS after B98.5 decided not to renew Steve McCoy's contract but they DID 
renew Vikki and she will be doing the morning show for another year...at least 
that is the term of her new agreement...or so I hear.  
Rumors of our return were just that...along with some wishful thinking on our 
part and the part of a few others, like yourself.  We are still looking for 
our next job...it's been pretty tough all over and radio is no exception. 
I hope you are well and enjoying life.  Keep up the good thoughts for us and 
hopefully, we'll be back on the air somewhere soon.  When we are, I'll be sure 
and holler real loud, so you'll know. 
You can keep track of us in the meantime at our web site:  
www.kellyandalpha.com 
I keep it updated with news and stuff pretty much every day.  Check it out 
and keep in touch.

It really is nice to have so many thoughtful friends.  

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

A REQUEST FOR YOUR PRAYERS FROM KELLY
Kelly has requested prayers for his mom.  Well, he's  the son she never gave birth to.  She's meant the world to him the past couple of years.  She's hospitalized with breathing problems and test are being run.  He's asked for your prayers for her...and I would suggest for him, as well.  He's by her side.  Your prayers are needed and appreciated.

COULD SPRING FINALLY BE SNEAKING BACK IN?
The forecast for the weekend says SIXTY DEGREES...WHOOO HOOOO!  It's been a while.  I'll take it.
     BACK ON THE AIR?
Many of you have contacted us to see if we'd be going back to our old haunts at WSB-FM...No, it looks like that door was closed again.  The station has decided to keep one half of the show they brought in to replace us.  It lasted about a year and a half...with no better success than we had and for a LOT MORE MONEY, it seems.  So...for now...life goes on...our hunt continues.  Thanks for your concern and thoughtfulness, though.

OK, THIS MAKES ME WANNA CHEW NAILS!  MY OPINION...
Three Navy Seals face the possibility of PRISON over accusations by a murdering, terrorist, animal.  That animal's name is, I Made Hashish a Bed...or something...wait...it's Ahmed Hashim Abed...I was close.  Here is what that PIECE OF GARBAGE DID...
Imade a Bed...or whatever...planned and orchestrated an attack on 4 INNOCENT, AMERICAN, CONTRACTORS in Fallujah, Iraq.  The place was a cesspool of terror and unrest following the defeat of Saddam Hussein's army.   Abed, and his assassins ambushed, these 4 men in their car and they were killed and set ablaze...maybe not in that order.  The bodies of were then defiled as they were tied to the bumpers of cars and dragged through the streets and then hung over a bridge, prominently in view of the city and many cheering Iraquis. 
ENTER THE NAVY SEALS.  An intensive search was launched for the perpetrators, particularly the mastermind, Abed.  He was captured.  NOW he is claiming that he was "punched in the stomach and given a bloody lip."  He's crying ABUSE AND TORTURE...and for some reason...we're listening.
The  response to these cowardly cries SHOULD BE, "Yeah, so what?"  BUT...instead the response by a government that is more concerned about offending the sensibilities of people who want to KILL us, is to PUT THE NAVY SEALS ON TRIAL FOR ABUSE!
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?  These men, these brave Navy Seals are heroes.  They captured a CRIMINAL (I'm being nice) and made him available to be brought to trial and delivered justice for his unspeakable mutilation of innocent human beings.  And what thanks do they get?  They get kicked in the teeth by our current leaders, who think it is "fair" that they be punished...obviously so as NOT to offend the Muslim world.

OK...though I am not authorized to do so by anyone, let me apologize for what these brave Navy Seals did...
Considering what your crimes are, Mr. Abed...and considering that ALL YOU GOT was a fat lip and a punch in the gut...sorry about that.

Considering the fact that they COULD have put on masks to hide their identity (as your comrades have done in cowardice) and set up a video camera to capture your screams as they slowly SAWED YOUR HEAD OFF (as some of your comrades did to journalist, Daniel Pearl)...BUT DIDN'T...sorry about that.

And now that there is a segment of our leadership that seems to believe that America is to blame for all of this.  That America is at fault for you and others like you, declaring a Jihad on US and want to KILL US.  That we have brought this hatred and declarations of war upon ourselves...I am truly very sorry about that.

I am sorry that we are unwilling to stand up and recognize that YOU HAVE DECLARED WAR ON US...and you actually believe YOU ARE AT WAR...BUT WE CHOSE TO DENY IT.   We, instead placate and acquiess to your every demand and go so far as to punish our soldiers who inadvertently and innocently "insult" you, your Koran or your religion.  I am really sorry about that.

Now, all those apologies out of the way...I hope we come to our senses, dismiss charges against the three Navy Seals and then get about the business of delivering the kind of justice to you that you deserve.  And for the record, I believe that justice is no better than the fate you delivered to 4 innocent men in the streets of Fallujah...and if I could...I'd suggest, just for giggles, we put you and those Seals in a room, close the door and just forget about what goes on for an hour or so...and show you how MINOR a fat lip really is. 

TURKS ARE INSULTED AND WITHDRAW THEIR AMBASSADOR TO THE US
Turkey is upset and as a matter of honor, have suspended diplomatic relations with the United States.  What is this all about?  It's all about a declaration in the US House of Representatives this week that stated that the World War I -era KILLING of 1.5 million Armenians...yeah, ONE AND A HALF MILLION Armenians was "genocide."  The Turks are INSULTED.  At what?  That everyone recognizes that they SLAUGHTERED 1 and a half million people?  NO...they are insulted that we stoop so low as to call it GENOCIDE.  They don't deny DOING IT...they are just offended that we call it genocide...
How utterly honorable...

MORE PROOF THAT WE'RE TOTALLY INSANE...
A Swiss condom manufacturer is coming out with a line of "EXTRA SMALL CONDOMS" for TWELVE YEAR-OLDS!!  Siting the battle against AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases, the company is marketing them to KIDS.
I just don't know what to say...
What'll it be there my little kinder?  Ah...could I have some Sweet Tarts, a comic book and a pack of those Pygmy Condoms?  Thank you, sir. 

IN CASE YOU'RE INTERESTED...THE OSCAR ODDS:
Best Odds for the Oscars

Best Actor

Jeff Bridges 1/6
George Clooney 13:1
Colin Firth 14:1
Morgan Freeman 25:1
Jeremy Renner 28:1

Best Actress

Sandra Bullock 4:6
Meryl Streep 2:1
Carey Mulligan 10:1
Gabourney Sidibe 20:1
Helen Mirren 80:1

Best Picture:

The Hurt Locker 5:6
Avatar 5:4
Inglourious Basterds 17:1
Up in the Air 66:1
Up 100:1
Precious 100:1
The Blind Side 125:1
District 9 150:1
A Serious Man 200:1
An Education 200:1

Best Supporting Actor

Christoph Waltz 1:20
Woody Harrelson 20:1
Stanley Tucci 33:1
Christopher Plummer 33:1
Matt Damon 40:1

Best Supporting Actress

Mo'nique 1:12
Anna Kendrick 18:1
Vera Farmiga 28:1
Penelope Cruz 33:1
Maggie Gyllenhaal 40:1

Best Director

Kathryn Bigelow 27:100
James Cameron 7:2
Quentin Tarantino 33:1
Jason Reitman 150:1
Lee Daniels 150:1


I DON'T WANT TO WIN AN OSCAR...JUST MAKE ME A PRESENTER
Here's what the presenters get for just handing out an Academy Award...the "Swag Bag."
Here's what's it it.

* $45,000 African safari trip complete with personal chef at the Lions Sands Game Preserve in South Africa

* $14,500 stay at the Monte Carlo Beach Hotel in Monaco

* $7,000 rustic getaway at the Winvian Luxury Hotel in Connecticut

* gourmet chocolate from Chocolatines by Sweet Endeavours (including Chocolate-dipped bacon)

* personal training sessions and a one-week all inclusive fitness bootcamp

* deeli.com online shopping cards

* Tiffany cat collar and "designer dog toys"

* WooLoot sport watches

* iFLY indoor skydiving experience

* HGTV "Green Home" mattress by Serta

* The Pig Board

* personal security alarm

* 1 year supply of Altoids Smalls

OK BRAIN...
If you have one of these...no matter WHAT IT'S WORTH, you can only sell it for a DOLLAR.  What is it?

Answer: YOUR OSCAR!
After Vivien Leigh's Oscar for Gone with the Wind was sold at auction for $510,000, the Academy instated a policy whereby an Oscar owner (its winner or inheritor), before auctioning the statuette, must first offer to sell it to the Academy for $1.

LATER
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

IT ACTUALLY LOOKS LIKE SPRING MIGHT BE HERE AFTER ALL...CANCEL THE HIT ON THE GROUNDHOG.


DUHHHA?
General Lee predicted an early arrival of Spring...well, maybe he was off just a little.  I'll take it any time it arrives.  I do feel a bit like a wimp, though for complaining about he weather when places like BALTIMORE and PHILADELPHIA have been HAMMERED this year.  Baltimore has had to deal with 80 INCHES so far this winter...who knows, they may get more.
So, with the radiant heat of SPRING TRAINING in full swing in Florida, maybe a little warmth is headed our way.  WHOO HOOO!

OK, WHAT'S WITH THE WHITE COATS?

I know, politics is so much drama but come on...people in white coats?  President Obama held a photo op to "suggest" that he will force congress to PUSH THROUGH on the health care bill.  It's called "reconciliation" but is commonly referred to as the "nuclear option."  It's a maneuver that has been used before but never on a bill with this level of opposition and one that would represent this large a portion of our national economy.  The new bill would fine employers $2,000 for each employee NOT covered under a company plan...which...I'm guessing would be cheaper than providing a plan, right?  It would also fine individuals who do not purchase their own health care.  Do you agree with this?  It's a FORCED expenditure on the part of the federal government...which I believe falls outside the bounds or our US Constitution. 
At any rate, the LAB COATS...it looks like Obama's doing a DR. SCHOLL'S COMMERCIAL.

GOOD-TIME CHARLIE'S GOT THE BLUES...

Representative Charles Rangel has taken a "leave of absence" from his CHAIRMANSHIP of the House Appropriations Committee.  The House Ethics Committe...those nitpickers...found a few "vio-lations" of House rules...picky, picky, picky.  Just because he took a few little trips to the Caribbean...paid for by lobbyists and certain corporations...come on!  Isn't that the kind of thing CONGRESSMEN and WOMEN have grown to EXPECT? 
Oh, they haven't even commented on his tax evasion...seems Charlie can't remember that he has a few MILLION DOLLARS tucked away in a few accounts.  But who DOESN'T forget THAT kind of thing? 
Oh, and his Dominican condo...oh, and the rent he received on his apartment buildings in Harlem...you expect a guy to keep track of ALL OF THAT? 
He's already blamed the tax thing on his wife and the trips...that was one of his staffers' fault.  
What do you want from your Congressmen...HONESTY?  INTEGRITY?  RESPONSIBILITY? 
Really?  Hmm...tough crowd.

RETURN TO GILLIGAN'S ISLAND?  REALLY? AFTER ALL THESE YEARS?

It seems that the BIG SCREEN is just dying for a "Gilligan's Island" MOVIE.  The TV show aired for 98 episodes from 1964-1967 and the series was canceled with the castaways STILL ON THE ISLAND.  I think if you'd go back now, you'd just find a few skeleton...not saying...just sayin...
Who knows...maybe there will be a big rescue this time. 
I did enjoy the show when it was on...but of course, I was 10!  I especially liked the episode when the ALMOST got off the island but then Gilligan did something stupid and messed it all up...remember that one?  You don't hmm...it was my favorite! 

SIP ON YOUR VENTI LATTE HALF-CAF AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK OF MY SMITH & WESSON
For some reason, Starbucks and a few other coffee shops have been chosen to make a stand for the right to bear firearms.  The Supreme Court is deliberating the right of local governments to supersede the Federal Law on gun ownership and the right to carry.  Chicago and Washington DC are two cities that ban the ownership of firearms and the decision is whether or not that is counter to the Constitution. 
Sooo...Starbucks employees have been instructed that if a customer comes in WEARING A HOLSTERED handgun, to just ignore it and serve up a hot beverage.  Would you be more afraid of the openly carried handgun or the one hidden in one's pocket? 
You might see a cutback on orders of ESPRESSO...some people might be jittery enough. 

OK...JUST FOR ME...HERE ARE A FEW THINGS I AM OVER...
I am over the GEICO commercial with the guy, drolly asking, (for example) if a 10lb bag of flour makes a big biscuit.
I am over FARMVILLE on Facebook.

I have more but I'd like to hear yours.  If there is something(s) you're OVER, let me know.  You respond by clicking the link at the bottom of this page and offering feedback and I'll post your replies.

IS YOUR DIET HEALTHY?  NO? HERE'S WHY!
The World's Healthiest Diets according to Forbes Magazine:
(The numbers are life expectancy and obessity rate)

1. Japan (82) (1.5%)
2. Singapore (82) (1.8%)
3. China (73) (1.8%)
4. Sweden (81) (11%)
5. France (81) (6.6%)
6. Israel (81) (24%)
7. Greece (80) (25%)
8. Italy (80) (13%)
9. Spain (80) (16%)
10.South Korea (79) (10%)

You see the common denominator?  See it?  NONE OF THOSE COUNTRIES SPEAK ENGLISH!
I don't think it's our DIET that's making us fat...IT'S SPEAKING ENGLISH!!
...just a theory...totally unscientific...but you knew that....


READY BRAIN?
According to a new book called, "We Won The Lottery"...a book about lottery winners' most unusual purchases, that after winning the big money, one in four winners blow some of their money on this....

Answer: PLASTIC SURGERY...most common?  NEW BOOBS!!

MOST UNUSUAL LOTTERY PURCHASES: (with my commentary no extra charge...you're welcome)
1. Recorded and released a single ...bet THAT worked out well... 
2. Pair of new knees ...wore the old ones out praying for a winning lottery ticket...
3. Hair salon ...see...something to FALL BACK ON...only open when YOU feel like it!
4. Racehorse ...FINALLY...A WISE INVESTMENT!
5. Robin Reliant ...WTH is THAT?
6. acres of Woodland and 300 new trees...what was wrong with the OLD trees?
7. Breast enlargements for her two sisters ...they must have been homely...
8. Flock of sheep ...make up your own punchlines...
9. A Whiskey factory ...something tells me THAT won't end well...
10. A 'Lady' title...we ASSUME it was for a female...

LATER
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WE'VE HAD A LOT OF NEW VISITORS HERE LATELY...THANKS!
Activity on our site has really picked up in the past few days...wonder what's going on!  We're grateful for all who come visit...no matter what the reason.  I hope you're finding something fun and entertaining here and keep coming back.  I'll keep posting things I like to talk about.

OH, HERE'S AN UPDATE...KELLY STEVENS IS NOW AND AVOWED THESPIAN

Yes, he's out...and he's cast in a new play at the Alliance Theater in the Acting Department.  I don't have all the details...but it LOOKS like he's got the roll of a praying mantis...a very LARGE praying mantis...he's probably saying GRACE. 
I'll post the details as they come in.

THEY'RE GOING NOOK-YOU-LAR

That is the term used on Capitol Hill for the term "Reconciliation."  Which is an even VAGUE-ER term for forcing through a piece of legislation.  It's been done before, but never for a bill with this level of opposition and one which will amount to 1/6 of our FEDERAL BUDGET! 
It's the health care bill and the Democrats are determined to make it law.  Republicans are equally determined to oppose and some "moderate" Democrats may resist it, as well.  BUT...it looks like there will be a HEALTH CARE BILL coming soon...whether you want it in this form or not.  Celebration time?

(Oooohhhh, Madame Speaker, do you think we could slip away behind one of these flags and...AW HAW HAW HAW?")
(Hmmm...Not NOW Mr. CHIEF OF STAFF....maybe later during the vote, we will push the buttons together")

I can't help it, this picture just looks so FUNNY. 

OK...ARE WE OVER THIS CHICK, YET?

Yes, she is WORLD CLASS BEAUTIFUL but is that any reason to keep excusing her for ASSAULTING PEOPLE?  What is this the THIRD...FORTH person she's attacked and injured?  This time it's her driver.  Apparently something set the diva off and she punched and slapped her driver from the back seat of her luxury limo.  The driver stopped the car immediately after the incident.   He found and told a traffic officer that Campbell hit him from behind hard enough for his head to hit the steering wheel and cause bruising under his eye.  This comes after doing some "community service" for attacking one of her assistants.  She's thrown phones, punches and insults...whaddaya say it's time to throw HER in jail?  Maybe a nice cellmate will show HER how to take a punch...

UPDATE--It looks like criminal charges will not be filed against Campbell...again...she gets away with it.

READY FOR ANOTHER TAX?...ON YOUR GAS?
Experts say that in order to meet CARBON DIOXIDE EMISSION STANDARDS laid out by the Obama Administration, TAXES on gasoline would have to rise...how much?  How about $4 per gallon bringing the price to about SEVEN DOLLARS PER GALLON!?! 
How's that GLOBAL WARMING WORKING FOR YOU NOW?

OH, YOU'RE ALREADY STARTING TO PAY FOR HEALTH CARE TOO...AT THE RESTAURANT!
And so it begins...restaurants in San Francisco have started to ADD ON taxes or FEES, in order to pay for HEALTH CARE.  You'll find a little extra charge on your bill at most SF eateries.  They will add a "few dollars" or a percentage in order to cover the cost of employees health care.
OK...if they are doing that...I figure the TIP is a way to compensate WAITRONS for the fact that "benefits" are generally NOT covered in their, usually, meager hourly pay.  Soooo...if they are NOW going to expect US to pay for their health care, shouldn't we drop the tip an equal dollar figure or percentage?
I would think that is fair, wouldn't you?
That is if you can AFFORD to eat out, any more...

AND FROM NEW RADIO STAR...
OK...IS THIS THE STUPIDIST?  MOST STUPIDIST?  KNOW ANYTHING MORE STUPIDER?
A British man is losing his driving license for six months after he was caught walking his dog from the driver's seat of his car. Police in Annfield Plain, England, said Paul Railton, 23, was driving along the street at 5 mph with his dog attached to a leash dangling out the window of his vehicle. Railton appeared before a judge and admitted to a charge of not being in proper control of a vehicle. He was issued three points on his license, bringing his point total to 12 and resulting in a loss of driving privileges for six months. He was also fined $99. "A lot of people exercise their dogs in that manner," Railton said. "It's a joke. I'm not bothered. I knew I'd get three points. I might save myself some money not having a car."
(YEAH...wha't the point of having a CAR if you can't use it to WALK the dog!)
Any wonder a study last week said that in 20 years, 80% OF BRITISH MEN WOULD BE OBESE!?!

OK...MAYBE THIS IS MORE STUPIDER...WOULD YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH WITH COW FECES?
This story comes from the Agence France-Presse...
The sacred status of cows in India has been even further enhanced because  research labs are developing a line of medicines made of cow feces and cow urine.  Scientists in Ahmedabad, India are using the feces and urine to formulate cures ranging from cancer to bad breath. Kesari Gumat, a scientist at the Ahmedabad Research Center, says the cures are contained in ancient Hindu holy texts.  The Center has 300 cows, where their excrement is collected and spread on the ground to dry in the sun. Visitors are asked to remove their shoes and socks and are then told to walk across the field of feces. "Walking on fresh cow dung is very healthy," Gumat said. "It kills all the germs and bacteria and heals wounds. And dry cow dung is a great scrub to get rid of dead skin and improve blood circulation." The list of uses of cow feces and urine include soap and toothpaste, incense sticks, and even a soft drink. Cows are sacred to the huge population of Hindus in India who don’t eat beef, but bodily excrement is acceptable once it has been stirred at a high temperature to kill dangerous bacteria. Impurities are removed from cow urine through distillation.

MMMM...nothing like an ice cold bottle of COW URINE after a hard workout...
Cow Pie Toothpaste?  Not the fist thing I want to stick in my mouth, first thing in the morning!

OK BRAIN...
A new study says, in order to have a happy marriage, husbands should do this TWICE A DAY.
What is it?

Answer:  COMPLIMENT HIS WIFE!
Whether she deserves it or not?  Ok, I'll shut up.
Here's the story:

Researchers asked 4,000 husbands and wives to pinpoint their happiness in eleven different aspects of married life and calculated the typical stage when everything falls into place.

Just under three years emerged as the point when couples feel completely comfortable with each other's bad habits and have a plan for their future.

The study also found that couples claim to have their best sex after two years and four months.

They'll also spend the longest amount of quality time together each evening and make small gestures like offering to cook dinner and help with the washing up."

According to the study, here are the Top 10 things that lead to a happy marriage:

Enjoy 1 hour and 15 minutes 'me time' each day
Saying 'thank you' for helping out with household chores
Taking walks together
Partner offering to make a cup of coffee
Spend 24 minutes having a heart-to-heart a day before bed
Kiss and make up following any arguments before falling asleep
Five hugs and at least one 'I love you' a day
Four texts, calls or emails during work a day
Curling up on the sofa together 3/week
Husband compliments their wife twice a day

Later
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